How long DOES it take to learn Gaelic?

So, how long *does* it take to learn Gaelic?

Three years.

Next question?


OK, maybe I had better expand on that a little bit.

First off, let's rephrase the question:

'How long does it take the average person of average ability with a fairly busy life to learn Gaelic to a conversational level?'

I reckon, in my experience as a very average learner, it takes between two and a half and three years. Roughly.

If you've cast half an eye over this blog before, you'll know I am a massive fan of the BBC Radio nan Gàidheal Lerners' programme 'Beag air Bheag' with Iain Urchardan.  Every week Iain introduces 'Neach-ionnsachaidh na seachdain', Learner of the Week, and these people each have a very different story to tell.

I remember in an early series, a very busy housewife who was massively commited to bringing up her family and to her church was barely able to string a sentence together after two years of learning. However, she still admirably put herself forward for an interview, and it was done in a way that she could cope with. On the other side of the coin, in the most recent series (Series 4) you had two different dudes (Martin B and Carmine) who had pretty much reached fluency after learning for barely a year. All these people serve to inspire, be it to show that even when you barely have a second to yourself you can pick up a little bit here and there, or that if you have the time and the inclination you can immerse yourself and become fluent in a comparatively short time.

These examples are, in my view, extreme. There is no doubt in my mind that Martin B and Carmine are very intelligent and focussed men. Most of us, me included, are neither particularly daft nor particulary bright. We have jobs and social lives and make the most of our free time. While the 'Holy Grail' in Gaelic is to reach fluency, what really makes the whole thing really come to life is to reach a conversational level - a level at which we can express ourselves. If you're doing the 'regular route' of distance learning by Cùrsa Inntrigidh followed by Cùrsa Adhartais with Sabhal Mòr Ostaig, that 'Eureka' moment comes roughly towards the end of the first year of Cùrsa Adhartais or during the second year.

The first two years of learning Gaelic, in my experience, can be the toughest. You learn and learn and learn and you still can't seem to be able to string a sentence together. Sure, you can say 'Ciamar a tha thu?' and as long as someone comes out with a response you know, you're good. You may get a few sentences down the line then the whole thing will stall. The person you're speaking to uses phrases and words you really don't understand, or you don't have the vocabulary to express what you want to say, and the sheer frustration makes you end up switching to English and you loose face.

However, if you keep at it and keep practicing your 'key phrases' and expanding your vocab, you'll eventually reach that Eureka moment where you hold your first conversation entirely in Gaelic. It might be broken Gaelic, there may be mistakes galore and the odd bit of 'Beurla' here and there, but you somehow manage to keep it all on track until the 'Mar sin leat' or 'Chì mi a-rithist thu' at the end. I guarantee you, the first time that happens, you'll be walking on air.

If you look back through the blog you'll see my frustration in the earlier days with the entry 'Why won't you talk to me?'

However, as I toured the Islands doing my project for 'Saoghal na Gàidhlig' (Module 7 of Cùrsa Adhartais') I found Gàidhlig gu leòr. It seems that if you stick at it, and people start to get to know you and know your story, you'll get Gaelic wherever it is found.

Of course, nobody but nobody ever stops learning Gaelic. Once you hit conversational level, the next stage is to expand your vocab and eliminate your mistakes until you hit fluency. Yet Gaelic is such a rich language, even the most fluent and learned speakers will always admit that there is plenty more out there to learn. That's the joy of Gaelic - its richness beyond measure. If you keep at it, it's all there for the taking.

You just have to keep going at your own pace; whether that is three months or three years, it really doesn't matter how long it takes to get there, just as long as you simply keep going. That's all you have to do.

Ceòlas - A Beginner's Guide

Let me tell you about Ceòlas. More particularly, let me tell you about Ceòlas Sgoil Chiùil Shamhraidh.

First off, there is a clue in the title that tells you that music plays a dominant part in Ceòlas. However, let’s not lose sight of the fact that Ceòlas does not have an English name. That alone tells you that this is all about the Gaelic: Language, music, and dance. Even if you’re like me and cannot play or sing a note and cannot dance a step, you can’t help but realise that none of these are ‘Gaelic’ in isolation. Gaelic is the language, the song, the dance, the poetry, the stories, and the people.

It is this encapsulation that makes Ceòlas such a breathtakingly ‘real’ event. It’s not just language lessons, piping practice or dance classes, it’s pure Gaelic in Action within a Gaelic-speaking community.

Ceòlas has been going for twenty years now in its home of South Uist in the Western Isles, and it’s been going from strength to strength. It’s evolved thanks to a dedicated and hard-working local team who know the event from the inside out. As such, it can be a bit daunting for the first-time Ceòlas attendee, as sometimes it’s not very clear exactly what it’s all about.

Having just completed my first Ceòlas event, I thought I’d present to you while I’m still fresh: ‘Ceòlas for Beginners’

EVENT OUTLINE

This outline is based on the 2016 event. It might be different in future!


The main summer school takes place the first week in July in Dalabrog on the island of South Uist.

While classes run from Monday to Friday, ideally you should plan to be in Dalabrog itself from Saturday to Saturday. Registration is at 1230 on Sunday, and while classes finish at 4pm Friday it would be a pity to miss the Cèilidh Mòr on Friday night. Which is actually a concert rather than a cèilidh. Confused? You will be.

FIRST CHOICE, SECOND CHOICE, AND GAELIC

When you apply you’ll be asked for your First Choice and your Second Choice subjects.

Now, in most cases you go to a summer school to do one thing (e.g. advanced Gaelic), and when asked for a second choice you tend to think that this is what you wouldn’t mind doing if your first choice wasn’t available, right?

Wrong.

This is a great example of where it works better in Gaelic where you are asked for your ‘Prìomh Chuspair’ agus ur ‘Darna Cuspair’.

What I didn’t realise as first, but is a terrific bonus, is that you don’t have to choose just one subject to do at Ceòlas, you can choose TWO SUBJECTS! If that is made clear anywhere, I obviously missed that memo.

This means you can do Advanced Gaelic and Beginner’s Step Dancing, Ceòl Mòr and song, Piping for Dancing and Intermediate Gaelic… or, in my case, ‘just Gaelic’. In the case of the advanced Gaelic group, we simply switched tutors for ‘First Choice’ (Catriona Nic an t-Saor) and ‘Second Choice’ (Alec Bhaltos).

Confused? Oh, it gets better. On top of that there is compulsory Gaelic for All for half an hour a day in the morning at six levels, from ‘Don’t have a word’ to native speakers/fluent for whom there is a talk. Of course, if you really don’t want to go to Gaelic nobody is going to force you, but if that’s your attitude then it does beg the question why you’d go to Ceòlas rather than just take instrument or singing lessons local to home.

CROSSOVER

To really mash things up, the last session of the day is called ‘Crossover’. No amount of explanations from the patient organisers could decipher to me exactly what this was about beforehand. However, it’s really quite simple. The organisers put two complimentary disciplines together, like fiddle and dance, and together you work out a short performance for a Friday afternoon show. In the Gaelic classes, we got together and under the guidance of Catriona, put on a comedy sketch about a dentist’s waiting room. Having never done drama before, and loving both comedy and Gaelic, I was absolutely in my element.

TIMETABLE AND CLASSES

The main ‘centre’ for now is Dalabrog Primary School - a brand new state-of-the-art building. Some of the classes - I think the piping and some of the dancing - took place in halls nearby with a minibus service ferrying folks to and from the school. Class size from what I saw was small. The most people in any Gaelic class I did was eight. The day starts at 9.30am and finishes earlier than I expected at 3.30pm but trust me - this is long enough!

Throughout the day I’d do six Gaelic classes of between 30 minutes and one hour. The first hour of the day, my ‘First choice’ was with the wonderful Catriona, and she always eased us into the day kindly and gently with an hour’s relaxed conversation. There were never any books or handouts, and I don’t think I wrote anything down.

After coffee break, the 30 minute ‘Gaelic for all’ class I chose to do with Alec Bhaltos, so I had different classmates to my previous lesson, and we always went through useful sentences to help expand our vocab in everyday situations. After that, it was an hour of ‘second choice’, so I stayed with Alec but my classmates changed. We did grammar revision and vocab expansion in Alec’s inimitably wonderful style. I’ve not met one person who doesn’t think he’s a brilliant teacher and a lovely man.

Lunch is served at 1230 in the main canteen, and while the soup received rave reviews from all who tried it, I stuck to a baked potato with filling every day, and with a can of pop I paid £3.15.

After lunch, an hour of ‘First Choice’ Gaelic normally took place outwith the classroom, e.g. a visit to the Kildonan Museum or a tour of the new Lochboisdale Marina in Gaelic.

Tea break back at base (cup of tea and slice of cake = £1), then 45 minutes of ‘crossover’, which for us meant reading, re-writing, practicing, and rehearsing our play. In other words, being very silly and having lots of laughs…in Gaelic!


THE SIX Cs

So that’s the serious stuff taken care of, but Ceòlas is only partly about the lessons. Arguably the most important bits are what goes on outwith the school, and that is the six Cs:

Ceòl
Coiseachd
Coimhearsneachd
Còmhradh
Cèilidh
and…most importantly, CÈIC!

CEÒL (music) pops up everywhere. The local hotels each hold a session on a rota which is displayed at the event. There are also various concerts in the week too - fiddles and dance, song, and piping.
COISEACHD (walking). A couple of walks were organised throughout the week that took place straight after classes ended. Both ended with a dram ;)
COIMHEARSNEACHD IS CÒMHRADH (community and conversation). This is arguably Ceòlas’ trump card. It takes place in an area that lives and breathes Gaelic. I stayed on a Caravan Club campsite in North Boisdale with the MacInnes family, who all speak to me in Gaelic. As I was thrapping about on my motorbike one day, I engaged in conversation with a local motorist in a ‘passing place’ (a regular island custom) and within two sentences we were in Gaelic. In my experience, I only ever had to revert to English in the Co-Op. That was it.
CÈILIDH - The Welcome Cèilidh, House Cèilidhs, and the Cèilidh Mòr. More on those later…
CÈIC - Most Ceòlas participants end up eating their own bodyweight in locally home-made cake during the week. It’s fantastic.


CÈILIDH GUIDE

There are three events in the week that are all called cèilidhs, yet they are all completely different to each other. My wee guide is intended to help you work through what is what.

The Welcome Cèilidh - Sunday evening. This is a cross between a knees-up, a concert, and the biggest collection of cake and sandwiches you’ve seen in your life. It’s the best £5 you’ll ever spend. Get there on time, don’t be fashionably late or you’ll end up like me, stuck by the bar and unable to see most of the acts. Now and again there are some dances where those who know the steps can get up and strip the willow or dash the white sergeant. At half-time the entertainment stops and the feeding starts. You get the feeling that there is a wee bit of local competition in the cake-making stakes because the standard of baking is incredibly high. On top of all this, there is a bar selling soft drinks for £1 and stronger stuff for £2-£3.

House Cèilidhs - Tuesday evening. Now, I didn’t go on one myself this time. I will do next time. In the school dining area, lists are put up with the names of local people who are throwing their kitchen doors open for Ceòlas participants to attend a proper Hebridean Cèilidh. If you want to go, you write you name on one of the lists. Guests are expected to take a wee gift for their hosts, for which in return they will once again be fed and watered to the gills. Whether you get singing or music depends on the hosts and your fellow guests. I have a few thoughts about this, which I will mention later.

Cèilidh Mòr - Friday evening. The word ‘cèildih’ has a broad range of meanings, but it would be easier for dumbwits like me to refer to this event as ‘The big concert’, as it is absolutely nothing like the previous two cèilidhs. This is a formal seated concert that must be one of the hottest tickets on the island, as it sold out this year. Luckily, I bought my ticket in good time. There is no food, and your only beverage option is to buy a soft drink during the interval. Other than that, you just sit and you listen…you listen to some of the finest music you’ll ever hear, from some staggeringly talented musicians.


So is there anything not to like? I try to write and honest and impartial blog after all. Well, there are three things I feel are worth mentioning in case anyone is interested:

First off, the ‘Advanced Gaelic’ was at the perfect level for me. I loved it and learned heaps. However, I know a few learners who are at a higher level than me and still chase the fruit of fluency. I do wonder if the level of Gaelic would be high enough for them. As there are (currently) only three levels of Gaelic, the two levels other than ‘complete beginner’ have to accommodate a very wide range of abilities. Let’s hope that an increase in students may result in an increase in levels of Gaelic.

Seondly, as this was my first Ceòlas and I didn’t really know anyone else there very well, I was not brave enough to attend a House Cèilidh. I don’t play, I don’t sing, I had no idea who the hosts were, and I didn’t know who did and didn’t have Gaelic. What would have been great would have been if one House Cèilidh was earmarked as the Gaelic House Cèilidh - i.e. Gaelic-speaking hosts and Gaelic-speaking guests. I’d have signed up for that one like a shot. Again, let’s hope…

Finally, there is only one thing really that would turn this fantastic experience into a Utopian Experience, and that would be Gaelic-speaking host families. Most people stayed in hotels, B&Bs, and rented houses. Me, I stayed in my caravan on the Gaelic-speaking site nearby which offered me some great opportunities to speak with my hosts, but to actually stay with a Gaelic-speaking family would just be the cream on the cake (we’re back to cakes again). Finding accommodation is the one thing that seems to prevent people attending Ceòlas, and home stays could not only plug the accommodation gap, but enhance the whole ‘Ceòlas’ experience even more, as well as giving the chance for some local folk to earn an extra bit of income.



There are ambitious plans afoot for Ceòlas to build its own, purpose-built arts centre in South Uist in partnership with the University of the Highlands and Islands, which is very exciting news. That will be a couple of years away yet, at least. My understanding is that these plans do not include any accommodation, so let’s hope the idea of Home Stays takes off if it’s to be as successful as it deserves to be.

If Gaelic to you means Grammar Books and Classrooms, then maybe Ceòlas is not for you. However, if you tingle at the very idea of the richness of Real-Life Gaelic in the Real World, where you finish a week and it feels strange to speak English again, then definitely book a week at Ceòlas next July. Just don’t book it too soon…at least not till I’ve secured my place.

Short Courses at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig

Apologies for the lack of posts recently. It's been a mad few months regarding my course. Not being the brightest button in the box, it's been a bit of a slog for me.

However, the academic year has now finished (woo-hoo!) and I can catch up on a few entries I've been meaning to write for weeks. Here's the first, and it's dedicated to the Short Courses at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig on the Isle of Skye.

Whether you don't have one word of Gaelic, or whether you're a native speaker just wanting to brush up on your grammar and literacy, there's a short course for you. There are also diverse courses such as singing, fiddle, and photography, where Gaelic isn't necessary, but practiced in a Gaelic environment.

So what can you expect from a Short Course?

Well, a lot will depend on your tutor and your fellow class mates.

Don't fret too much about what level to go in at. It's pretty obvious to go in for Gaelic 1 if you've not got any Gaelic, or Gaelic 2, 3, 4, if you're going through the stages one by one, but if you're coming in from the cold of a distance-learning course, or if you want to refresh your rusty skills, it can be a bit of a challenge to know which level to go for .

Naturally, it makes sense to discuss any concerns with the short course team before you enrol, but if you do find your class too easy/too difficult/not your style, you can normally switch to a different class during the week if there is space. A friend of mine switched twice in a week!

Lesson periods are generally 75-90 minutes long, with two sessions in the morning and two in the afternoon. There are no lessons on a Wednesday afternoon (trust me, you'll be glad of the rest) and Friday afternoon is only one session and an early finish to allow people to get home.

You won't get bored in the evening as there is always something on. Monday to Wednesday there is an hour's 'Cearcall Còmhraidh' (Gaelic conversation) which is open to all, and there are events such as quizzes and concerts. Thursday evening is the grand 'Cèilidh' where classes perform a song, sketch, or poems that they've been learning throughout the week. Nobody is put 'on the spot', it's all very much a group effort and it's a really good craic.

As for accommodation, the rooms are all private with ensuite loo and shower facilities and a kitchenette either in the room or down the corridor; basic, clean, and comfortable. You can, if you wish, camp in a tent or stay in your camper van/motorhome/caravan, but be aware that there are no 'camper's facilities' apart from WCs and payable showers in the main building, and there is nowhere to empty chemical loo waste. Camping is, however, free of charge as long as you're attending a course, but the cost of hooking up to the mains if you wish to do so is prohibitive. You're better off charging your phone and laptop during the day while you're in class if you don't have a solar panel.

As well as being a Gaelic environment in which to immerse yourself, the college also has the advantage of a *stunning* location:

For many folks, the trip to Skye is a long one. As such, a lot of people do two, three, or even four consecutive courses and stay for up to a month. You're pretty much left to your own devices at weekends, so a car would be useful - or a friend with a car. Armadale is about a mile away so there is always the possibility to get the ferry to Mallaig and the Small Isles if you wish, or just take a walk in the local area. Sadly the library is closed at weekends which is a bummer.

Is there anything not to like? Well, by the time you add on accommodation and meals it can start to get a little spendy, but no more that you'd normally spend on a week's holiday. It's possible you may end up with classmates or a tutor that you don't get along with, but that could happen anywhere on any type of course. If you're that unhappy you can switch courses.

On one or two of the advanced courses I've been on there was homework to do, which took up the whole evening after a day's lessons, and prevented me from getting to the conversation sessions and the evening socials. I've now decided that that is really not on, and have made my thoughts clear to the powers that be. Remember that YOU are paying for the course and if there is something that you don't want to do, then simply don't do it. But I would hope that the homework element of the advanced classes has now been dropped.

But let's get back to the good stuff. On top of the ability to speak Gaelic all day, every day, there is also an amazing library to lose yourself in. It's not all high-brow academic stuff in there, being a transport geek and a bit of an Anorak, I particularly enjoyed the railway and ferry books.

Above all, attending a Short Course allows you to meet up with like-minded folk. People I've met at Sabhal Mòr have become firm friends. And those friends have been absolutely invaluable, especially during the 'low' periods that we all get at times. Whether it is practical help with the genitive case, getting together on Skype for conversation practice, or support for when the going gets tough, making such wonderful friends has been the most important part of every short course I've attended. I could not imagine my Gaelic studies without them.

You might not meet anyone you like first or even second time around, but do give the Short Courses a try. You won't realise it at the time, but your 'cuid Ghàidhlig' and your confidence in using it will soar.

http://www.smo.uhi.ac.uk/en/cursaichean/cursaichean-goirid/

Learner of the Week

Anyone who has been following this blog will know that I am very fond of the Gaelic Learners' Programme on BBC Radio Nan Gàidheal, Beag Air Bheag (Little by Little), currently steaming ahead through its third series. If you cannot access Radio Nan Gàidheal, you can download the podcast, or listen via the BBC website.

There is an earlier blog entry about the programme here.

On the programme there is a section called 'Neach-Ionnsachaidh na Seachdain', Learner of the Week. Learners of ALL abilities are invited onto the programme to speak of their experiences. Speak, that is, IN GAELIC!

It was way back in March this year when the Main Man Behind the Scenes, Calum, wrote to me inviting me onto the show as Learner of the Week.

Two thoughts immediately entered my head:

NO! My Gaelic is nowhere near good enough, and I'll make an idiot of myself!
-and-
YES! It will be a great experience, and to date there has never been a Learner of the Week that lives outwith Scotland.

Anyway, I reluctantly agreed but then things went quiet for a while as Series 2 was wrapped up. It took a lot of arranging to get both myself (from Dover) and presenter John Urquhart (from Skye) in a city with a BBC recording studio at the same time, but a date was eventually struck for 10th November as we would both be in Glasgow. I was holding out for a Helicopter from London or a Stretch Limo to Stornoway, but oddly enough the BBC makes slightly better use of its coffers.

Even before the date was set, the fact that I was going to be on BBC Radio Nan Gàidheal speaking Gaelic remained in the back of my head. For the entire summer I had great big fat juicy carrot dangling in front of me, helping me get on and improve my spoken Gaelic. It was that, or face the embarrassment of not being able to string together a sentence after two and half years of learning.

So what is the experience like?

To start with, it is absolutely nothing to worry about. As you might have gathered, the questions follow pretty much the same pattern for every Learner every week, so you know what you are likely to be asked. To make sure you are comfortable, you'll be sent a list of the kind of questions you'll get a couple of weeks beforehand. 'How long have you been learning Gaelic? What does Gaelic mean to you personally? Tell us something unusual about yourself...?' and so on.

For the three weeks leading up to the 'Big Day', I spent a lot of time writing out, correcting, and rehearsing my answers. My Study-Buddy MR in London was an absolute Diamond, giving me many, many hours of his time to help with my grammatical correctness and with my pronounciation.

Suitably rehearsed and drilled, I headed to the smart, swish, BBC studios at Pacific Quay in Glasgow on the set day.

Sitting in the waiting area waiting for Calum to collect me, I whipped out my smartphone and looked at the dictionary at learngaelic.net.  I knew that Calum's first question would be 'Ciamar a tha thu?' (How are you?) and I had no idea how to say 'I'm a bit nervous' in Gaelic. It's 'Tha mi beagan nearbhach', just so you know.

Up we went through the fabulous Atrium I have only ever seen on the telly to the studio itself:

I had met John many times before, so we greeted each other like old friends. Yet it wouldn't matter if you have never met him in your life - everybody who meets the man instantly loves him. I have never heard one bad word spoken about him, ever. So if you go for it, be assured you will be put at your ease and treated very gently.

With my notes written on my tablet (that's the device, not the toffee), we had what can only be described as 35 minutes of craic. All the speech training I had done with MR went out of the window. All those set phrases I had learned vanished. We just simply... chatted. I think this says a lot about Iain's journalistic expertise and people skills.

Afterwards, of course, I thought about things I wish I had said, or how I might have answered differently, but I think that would be the same for anyone in any situation. I never did say how Gaelic has enriched my life, which I really wanted to do... but I did get in a plug for the blog, so hopefully anyone who is interested will read the previous entry 'I'm Rich!'

Yes, there were mistakes. Yes, there were stutters and long pauses which will no doubt (I hope) be edited out. All that pronounciation I had learned - from 'agam' to 'uabhasach', went clean out of my head.

The producer wasn't sure when this particular recording will be broadcast, but it looks like it might be between four and six weeks. Trust me, I will keep you updated.

In hindsight, this is probably the best thing I have ever done. Why? Because when I got the first email about appearing, I could hardly string a sentence together. Suddenly I had a MA-HOOSIVE incentive to get my spoken Gaelic up to scratch. After the (self-imposed) rehearsing and practice I sat and chatted comfortably in Gaelic for 35 minutes, and we could have gone on all morning if we had had the time.

Could I have done that without Beag Air Bheag? I don't think so. Taking yourself outside of your comfort zone will improve your language skills massively.

So what are you waiting for? Best get in touch with Beag Air Bheag team. Whether or not I will be saying that after I have heard myself on air, I'm not so sure. But I cannot thank Calum, John, and the team enough for the privilege of being invited onto the programme, and for giving me the incentive to improve my Gaelic to a level that, six months ago, was beyond my wildest dreams.

In search of Gaelic, my road trip to the Isle of Lewis

Last week, in an attempt to improve my spoken Gaelic and try and do something about my horrendous English accent, I nipped up to the Isle of Lewis for a couple of days.

Being a bit of a ferry geek, I was keen to take a trip on CalMac's new ferry the Loch Seaforth. Like most folks I have spoken to, I find it smart and swish but full of design quirks that beggar belief. The main thing is the televisions. Gees! There are TVs everywhere! Even in the lounge where you sit with the dog, all the seats face one way and there is even a TV on the wall BEHIND all the seats, so you'd have to crick your neck 180 degrees to even see it.

Nice ferry CalMac. Just ditch the tellies, please!

Not one was showing BBC Alba of course, but full marks for the Gaelic announcements on board.

My accommodation in the village of Achmore (near Leurbost) was at a B&B called Westend, run by Gaelic Tutor and local celeb Maggi (Magaidh) Smith.

You'll see on Magaidh's sign something I wish other Gaelic-speaking B&Bs would do - be PROUD of the Gaelic spoken! I was welcomed with tea and biscuits and a warm craic in Gaelic. It was then that I realised that I'm not as fluent as I would like to be, but hey. We spoke English when I couldn't cope any more, so don't feel that you need to speak Gaelic if you don't want to. As is the mantra at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig, it is all about just using the Gaelic that you have, no more and no less.

For £30 per night including a nice brekky of fresh fruit, muesli, cereal, and yogurt, it was a nice place to stay. The room was cosy, clean and comfy. It does lack a desk but Magaidh allowed me to use her camping table in the laundry room. Wifi ('island' speed) is included. OK for basic browsing, but don't try and download anything.

The new, immaculate shower room and WC is directly across the hall, and as this is the only guest room Magaidh has, you have exclusive use.

Like many islanders, Magaidh has about 395 jobs on top of all the charity and voluntary work she does. Conversation opportunities were limited to breakfast, and a chat in the evening - pretty much the same as any B&B host. However, for an additional fee you can book her for an hour or so if you need to go through anything you're stuck on. It's definitely worth calling for a chat first if you are coming here on an informal language break.

Most of my Gaelic conversation was with friends that I had met beforehand. However, one evening Magaidh was running a wee cèilidh in Stornoway and I was invited to that. Sadly, there was limited opportunity to speak Gaelic as most of the native speakers spoke to me in English as usual.


All in all I had a nice time and enjoyed my autumn break on the beautiful Isle of Lewis. Every time I visit Lewis, I fall in love with it just a little bit more.

As for the Gaelic, you will get nowhere near as much from such a break as you would from a short course at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig - here there is far more of the  'holiday' element. However, you'll get a stack more opportunity to use what Gaelic you have by staying here with Magaidh and being introduced to local folks than you would by staying in an impersonal hotel.

Come out of the closet!

The nervous teenage boy enters his parent's sitting room.

'Mum, Dad, I have something to tell you. I'm Gael.'

Mum bursts into tears. Dad gets angry.

'But...but why son? Was it something we did? I KNEW we should never have had that holiday in Barra in 2009.'

'It's just the way I am. I've been surpressing it long enough, and I can't hold back any more. I'm Gael.'

Mum dries her eyes. 'I should have guessed. You left your computer on once and I saw you'd been looking at dirty websites like learngaelic.net. I've heard you listening to 'Beag Air Bheag' podcasts through your headphones. I even found those disgusting magazines under your mattress. Yes, those Sabhal Mòr Ostaig course notes and prospectuses from those 'weekends away' when you pretended you were going to the city with your mates to get off your face on booze and drugs and end up in trouble with the Police. But they were all lies weren't they? You were sneaking off up to weekend schools in Skye, learning the Gaelic, playing the fiddle, reciting poetry, singing songs and other such disgusting behaviour. How could you? HOW COULD YOU?'


OK, so this is all a bit tongue in cheek, but I'm prompted to imagine this scenario by two separate thoughts.

First off, it's to help my own understanding of why someone from the South East of England feels such a strong affinity with the Highlands and Islands, and Gaelic, despite the lack of roots. Well, sometimes strength of feeling cannot be explained logically, it just IS. Think of the men and women 'trapped' in the 'wrong' bodies. Transexuals are often ridiculed, but I for one think that you'll not find a a stronger and a tougher band of people. These folks have such a strong feelings from within that they are prepared for the mental and physical battle that lies between the gender that they are born with and the gender at which they will finally be at peace. As someone who is very happy in my own skin, I don't really understand it, but that doesn't mean to say I don't respect and admire these folk. Live and let live and celebrate diversity.

So while I'm happy with my skin and who I am, I often feel like there is a Gael deep down inside me busting to get out. I don't understand it, but am taking on the tough battle to let it out. Thank goodness I don't have to go through painful surgery or psychological analysis.

Just like the transgender man living as a woman before the operation has to endure the jibes and sneers of the mob, the Englishman learning Gaelic has to endure the thinly-veiled racism of the anti-English brigade. References to the 'Auld enemy,' 'the Bad Side of the Border,' and far, far worse will always serve to remind me that I am alone in a place where people hate the place where I was born and brought up. Yet, rather than give it all up, us English folk learning Gaelic just have to shoulder it and get on with it. Yes, there are many aspects of English Culture, History, and Politics about which I am deeply unhappy, but that doesn't make me as an individual responsible for any of them. As for History... well, so much of that is placed in a romantic light by dreamers who forget about one crucially important factor, and that is context. Dreamers and romantics refer to historical events in a modern-day context, which skews fact and interpretation.  Do I hold my German friends accountable for the destruction of my corner of the country and the loss of life 100 and 75 years ago? No. Do they hold me accountable for Dresden and the like? No. We shall never forget, but we shall also move on.

As for 'coming out of the closet,' it still amazes me how many Gaelic speakers hide their language and culture. Of course, Gaels are notoriously polite, decent, and modest folk, and their lack of arrogance and selfishness is one of the main reasons that I find the whole culture so utterly amazing and wonderful. However, this in itself brings additional challenges for the learner.

Let's look at our friends in the Gay Community. A generation or two ago, even the most placid and peaceful men and women were faced with no option than to be vocal and visible. It was the only way to get their rights to be who they are accepted and integrated into wider society. There is still some way to go, but things are moving in the right direction. A generation or two ago, if a train driver announced he was gay in the messroom it could have ended in his being ostracised and cut off, excluded and lonely until possibly he ended up on a downward spiral. I say 'he', because women didn't drive trains then. Nowadays, if a train driver announced that he or she was gay, it would be about as exciting and controversial as what was on the menu at the staff canteen.

What has this to do with Gaelic? Well, there is just so much of it in the Closet, and that makes it difficult for the learner and the would-be learner to find it being used in everyday life. Bigots will always put down minority groups because bigots are ignorant, and ignorance promotes fear. Ignorance means that they don't understand it so they try to kill it. When cultures and lifestyles are dragged out into the open and life doesn't end because of it, ignorance gradually fades.

Right now, the only way for somebody to learn Gaelic as an adult is to do it through some kind of a course. Ùlpan is the least academic course, but these courses are few and far between, and they never seem to be consistent or structured in their occurrence. The only clear courses with a clear progression path are the academic ones, at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig in Scotland and a few other colleges and universitites in the UK.

However, on social media I have been following a few Gaels who are disparaging towards the 'academic' approach to Gaelic. It's true that when you're at Sabhal Mòr, you are surrounded by people who have the time, brain power, and financial means to devote to an Academic Course. It is a luxury not everyone can afford, and in a chat with other students, we voiced concern that Gaelic is becoming a Luxury Language for the Middle Classes.

But what are the options, when Gaels refuse to speak Gaelic outwith people they know?

I am on a bit of a personal mission to find Gaelic outside the classroom. I have searched for homes or farm stays where guests can stay for a week with a Gaelic-speaking family and pick up what they can. So far, I have not found any such thing. I am sure that there are many farms, B&Bs, cafes, and other social places where Gaelic is spoken, yet this fact is never advertised. Just like some places are 'Bikers Welcome' or 'Walkers Welcome', howabout a scheme where 'Gaelic Spoken' is used in marketing? It would make life a lot easier for us intermediate learners who are looking for opportunities to consolidate all those words and grammar that's jumbled about in our heads into real-life sentences outside the classroom.

I have found one - just one - B&B where Gaelic is not just spoken, but it is promoted. That B&B is on the Isle of Lewis, and tomorrow I will head on up there to check it out. When I phoned to book and spoke Gaelic to the landlady, she never once reverted to English, even when I struggled. Now THAT is the kind of thing I'm looking for! Stay tuned and I'll tell you how it goes. 

'Getting' the future tense

The verb 'faighinn' in the future tense.

Irregular verbs, don't you just love 'em? There aren't actually that many in Gaelic compared to some other languages, but there are a few there with the primary purpose of being a challenge to remember.
In order of 'stem - past tense - future tense,' my four nightmare verbs are:

rach - chaidh/cha deach - thèid (go)

abair/can - thuirt - canaidh (say)

faigh - fhuair/cha dh'fhuair - gheibh/chan fhaigh (get)

thoir - thug - bheir/cha toir (give)


I find it really hard to commit these forms to memory. 'I went' is 'Chaidh mi...' yet 'I didn't go' is 'Cha deach mi...', as irregular in Gaelic as it is in English. Then in the future form you get another word - thèid - but at least this is fairly consistent throughout, dropping its lenition when making pronounciation easier.

The best way to remember things, of course, is to get them to make you laugh.

My 'Caraid Cànan' M made me laugh the other day with the verb 'get' in the future tense, and finally it has stuck.

All through the future tense, it's 'faigh' (rhymes with 'high'), with or without lenition, except the simple future which is a completely different word: Gheibh, loosely pronounced 'yeahv'.

Now, if you've been learning Gaelic more than a couple of months you'll soon be told that the phrase 'mas e thu toil e' ('if you please') is never, EVER uttered by native Gaelic speakers in everyday use.

Manners are implied by use of tense and the question form, so while 'bheir sibh dhomh cupa tì' (give me a cup of tea) is as direct and rude as it sounds in English, the phrase 'am faigh mi cupa tì?' (may I get a cup of tea?) is normally used instead. Forget sounding American, 'am faigh mi...' was around for a long time before English-speaking folk started imitating their American cousins.

So... we're used to 'am faigh mi...', to which of course the response in the negative is 'chan fhaigh' (easy enough to remember) but in the positive is 'gheibh'. Gheibh, as already mentioned, bearing no resemblance to the root 'faigh'.

So... how to remember this?

A great way to remember this is to think of the non-Gaelic speaker visiting a Gaelic speaking canteen-style cafe, and trying their best with the people serving the food:

'Am faigh mi seo?' (May I get this?) 'Gheibh' (You may)
'Am faigh mi seo?' 'Gheibh'
'Am faigh mi seo?' 'Gheibh'

Perplexed, our non-Gaelic speaker takes his food to his table and quietly has a word with his Gaelic friend.

'Well, they're a cheery bunch in here' he says to his friend.
'What do you mean?'
'Well, every time I used that phrase you taught me to get something, they practically cheered! I thought they were going to high-5 me every time!'
'I still don't get what you mean.'
'When I asked for and pointed at the fish, they went 'YEAH!'. Then when I asked for peas, they went 'YEAH!!' Then when I asked for chips, they again went 'YEAH!!!' Are they always that happy?'

His friend thought briefly, then put his hand over his eyes: 'Gheibh' said the friend. 'Gheibh'.


 Now, can anyone think up a joke for chaidh/cha deach/thèid? ;) 

We Need to Talk - and the Solution is Simple

Learning Gaelic can be challenging enough if you live in Scotland. However, if you live outwith Scotland, it can be even more of an uphill - and satisfying - struggle.

My Study Buddy 'C' recently sent me this link to a recent BBC News story:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/naidheachdan/33558755

'Cothroman a dhìth gus Gàidhlig a bhruidhinn' is the title of the piece, 'Lack of opportunities to speak Gaelic'.

Results of a recent survey show that one of the biggest challenges facing Gaelic learners is the ability to use their language skills outwith the classroom. Some of the students surveyed NEVER get the chance to practice.

You only have to look at my earlier blog entry 'Why Won't You Talk to Me?' to see the real life challenges faced by a real Gaelic learner when in the Outer Hebrides.

Before we look at my simple and all-pleasing solution to the problem, I need to have a minor rant about additional challenges for us Non-Scots who chose to pump our money into the country and learn its language.

For starters, take that survey. If it is the recent survey that took place earlier this year, then it only concerned itself with Gaelic Learners that reside in Scotland. Despite the fact that many Gaelic Learners are in England, Wales, Germany, the USA, and Canada, our views were not courted.  Just so you know, the results are only applicable to Scottish Learners, so the chances we have outside Scotland are even slimmer or non-existant.

To add insult to injury, the fees paid by Gaelic Students in England, Wales, the USA, and Canada can be over three times higher than those paid by Scottish students. When I last looked, for me to do An Cùrsa Comais at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig would have set me back £7,500 in fees compared to £2,200 for a Scottish resident. That's fair enough I guess (thank you, David Cameron and all those who voted for him) and the same fees apply to those resident in Wales, Northern Ireland, the US, and Canada. However, were I to live 25 miles away in Calais, I'd be paying the £2,200 along with all the German, Polish, and other EU Students. I thought that the UK was in the EU? Not when it comes to tuition fees. So not only are the English, Welsh, and Northern Irish charged three times the amount of someone living South of the Irish border or East of the English channel, but our views counted for nothing in the Gaelic Learning Survey. Well Gee Thanks Eddy, that really makes us feel valued for taking such an active interest in Gaelic and Scotland and overcoming all the associated hurdles and barriers!

Rant over.

I have to be grateful that at least those of us in 'Rest of UK' have access to the wonderful BBC resources, such as the podcasts of 'Beag air Bheag' on BBC Radio nan Gàidheal, and iPlayer programmes from BBC Alba. These resources help massively.

Back to the 'Lack of Opportunity' bit. I had an idea a while ago that I mentioned to folks at my college but nobody really took any notice. I'll mention it again now.

On one hand you have Gaelic learners in Scotland and around the world with little or no opportunity to practice their language skills.

On the other hand, we have a diminishing number of native Gaelic speakers whom at one time were monolingual and had to learn English as a second language. These people speak with old dialects and rich vocabularies that are crying out to be saved. These people are the Older Gentlefolk of the Highlands and Islands. Despite the enviable sense of community in these areas, there must still be times when these retired men and women feel a little lonely and isolated. And all but a few of them will have a telephone.

You can see where this is going, can't you?

Surely it cannot be that difficult to marry up Gaelic Learners with patient older folk who would love to receive a weekly half-hour phone call from their 'Caraid Cànan' in Berlin, London, or Pitlochry?

Being down here in the South East of England I don't really know how to go about setting up something like that. Surely it can't be that difficult? It's an idea anyway. It's now out there, so let's hope that somehow it grows legs.

Why won't you talk to me?

Apologies for the lack of posts for a while… many other learners out there will appreciate that it’s been end of term assessment time here in Scotland.

However, with the business done, it’s time to enjoy a couple of weeks holiday, and where else but in the Outer Hebrides where at least you can practice your Gaelic?

Or can you?

As hinted at in an earlier entry, there are many reasons that a Gael may be reticent to speak Gaelic with someone they don’t know. I had a very interesting conversation with a Gaelic crew member on a CalMac ferry about it, which I shall come to later.

But first, just to give you an idea of what it’s like, let me tell you about my experience trying to buy a pint of milk in the community store this afternoon. As I was browsing the shelves, I heard the shop assistant chatting away in Gaelic to a regular customer. I got to the till, put my bottle of milk on the counter, and the conversation went exactly like this:

Me: ‘Feasgar math. Seo a-nis.’
Shop Assistant: ‘That’ll be one pound ten please.’
Me: ‘Obh…tha mi duilich, chan eil deich sgilling agam. Sin sibh.’
SA: ‘Thanks… and that’s ten pence change.’
Me: ‘Mòran taing. Mar sin leibh!’
SA: ‘Thank you, bye.’

I left the shop just about ready to give it all up.

On the ferry over to the islands, I got talking to a very nice crew member from Barra, a native speaker. We chatted about Gaelic, and I asked why so many people are reticent to speak it, especially outwith people they know.

The lady explained in a roundabout way that she, like many, is a little embarrassed of her Gaelic. It’s not what she considers ‘proper’ Gaelic. She gave two examples. One was when she worked on a ship with another Gael who flatly refused to understand her Gaelic (like the interaction above where there wasn’t even the smallest attempt to engage) and always spoke to her in English. Another was when the BBC journalist Andreas Wolf travelled on her ship and spoke to her. You may remember my earlier entry about Andreas, one of the few people people I am totally in awe of. Despite being a ‘new speaker’ (the latest term for ‘learner’), his Gaelic is perfect. And that was this lady’s problem… in her eyes, her Gaelic was not perfect. She was embarrassed. So she hardly ever speaks it. As we all know with languages, ‘If you don’t use it, you lose it,’ and here we witness yet another Gaelic speaker fading into history…


The 'wrong' Gaelic


If we go back to the 70s and earlier, it was almost impossible to hear a presenter or narrator speak with a regional accent or dialect on British TV and national radio. It was always ‘The Queen’s English.’ Only in the 80s did regional accents become popular and accepted into the mainstream. Of course, there is still pub or messroom banter at work between friends mocking the ‘funny’ way they say things if they are from another British region, but personally I have never witnessed anyone saying that something is ‘wrong’ if it is pronounced differently. I say bath and you say bath yet we both say father. I say rolls and you say cobs. I say little and you say wee. 

However, it appears that in the minds of many Gaels, there are no Gaelic dialects. Barra does not have a dialect, Lewis does not have a dialect, Uist does not have a dialect… instead you  have Barra Gaelic, Lewis Gaelic, Uist Gaelic… and countless other ‘Gaelics’ like Harris, Skye, Argyll, Islay…

Yet for some reason, in the minds of many Gaelic speakers, there is no ‘different’ Gaelic dialect, only ‘wrong’ Gaelic. ‘Oh, we don’t say that HERE’ has been spat at me on more than one occasion after saying the ‘wrong’ word.





Maybe what many native speakers don’t realise is that us learners/'new speakers' are exposed to all kinds of Gaelic, but this itself is taught within the Gaelic Orthographic Convention oojimaflip. No, even I don’t understand why certain things like the numbering system had to change. The French seem to manage quite well with a non-decimal counting system (‘sixty-ten, four twenties, four twenties ten’) and some of the spellings would have been better left as they were. I’d have been able to pronounce ‘feuch’ correctly far quicker if it was still ‘fiach’. However, I’m still getting my head around three ways to say ‘because’ (air sgath, o chionn, air sàillibh) for three different dialects, and I notice that Iain Urchardan’s  wonderful ‘Beag air Bheag’ Learner’s Programme on the radio goes to great lengths to include at least three different dialects every week.

The refusal of many Gaelic speakers to engage in conversation is one of the biggest challenges I have come across. I’m more forgiving of those who at least try at first, but switch to English at the first mistake, although that is still a bugbear. However, you can’t blame anybody for not having the patience to indulge the mistakes of a Learner. It’s annoying, but that is the price we pay for steamrollering English as the language of all communication throughout the entire UK.


Cùm a' dol


I shall leave you with a positive story.

A few months ago, during a weekend school at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig, the tutor wheeled in a former student of the course we’re on, who is now completing his degree in Gaelic. This chap’s parents were Gaelic speakers but never, ever spoke to him in their native tongue. He was brought up in English and had to learn Gaelic through college.

Eventually, this chap told us, he rang up his Dad and spoke Gaelic to him. His father answered him in English. He continued in Gaelic. His father answered in English. Apparently, the whole conversation went like this. A bit like my conversation with the shop assistant.

The next time he phoned, he spoke Gaelic. His father answered in English. And so on and so on for the next three or four phone calls.

Finally, on the fifth or sixth phone call, the man’s father conversed in Gaelic, and they continue to do so to this day.

It was an inspiring talk he gave us. We just need to keep focussed on speaking Gaelic and not giving up hope. Other folks’ reticence to engage us in Gaelic is just another challenge that makes it all the more interesting. A bit like the genitive case. I’ll tell you this, Gaelic is not for wimps.

The question is, how many pints of milk will I have to buy to achieve the same result with the shop assistant?

Beag air Bheag - Little by Little

Image property of BBC

Most Gaelic learners have heard of 'Beag air Bheag le Iain Urchardan' by now. If you haven't, let me tell you about it.

No matter what your level of Gaelic, from beginning to advanced, if you are a learner and you have access to BBC services, you need to be listening to this fantastic radio programme.

At the end of last year, a series of 10 x 30 minute episodes ran on BBC Radio Nan Gàidheal. I found out about it roughly half way through the series. Sadly there was was no Podcast to download, but happily the past episodes were available for 4 weeks via iPlayer Radio. I don't have broadband, I rely on tethering my mobile phone for internet reception. I became so hooked on 'Beag air Bheag' I ended up increasing my data allowance as I was listening every morning.

I was very pleased when Series One was repeated directly after it ended, so I could start again with episode one and keep up a constant supply of episodes via iPlayer. It was just a pain that I relied on mobile phone reception (3G or 4G) to keep connected. There is no Radio nan Gàidheal radio reception in the South of England!

I'm guessing the series was a Pilot to gauge reaction. All my learner friends were full of praise for the programme and it was lauded during class-phone sessions and at weekend school at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig.

To my utter delight, Series Two was quickly announced. I can only guess that we weren't alone in our enthusiasm.

Even better news was that Series Two would be bigger and better in every way.

For a start, there are 15 episodes planned (count them, FIFTEEN!) and they are now a whole hour long, not just 30 minutes. But the best news of all? You can download them as a Podcast. No more relying on a mobile phone signal or being tied to the internet for the 90% (my guess) of listeners who listen outwith the Radio Nan Gàidheal signal area. Right now (early April 2015) we are on the cusp of episode three which will be broadcast this week.

If you're just setting out in Gaelic you may worry a little that you don't understand a single word, as the entire programme (bar a few technical words that few people know and some of the Grammar Points) is delivered in Gaelic. However, owing to the fact that Ian Urchardan, the presenter, speaks slowly and clearly, you are very quickly able to pick out the words that you DO know. Just to pick out a few words will help you commit them to memory. You'll also end up hearing the same unfamiliar words week in and week out. Eventually you get to know the word but not its meaning. For example, for weeks I heard an expression that sounded like 'Grass cainch' and wondered what it was. Every week I heard 'Grass cainch'. Hmm.

Weeks later I discovered that the word used was actually 'gnàthas-cainnte', meaning idiom, saying, or expression. Gaelic has a lot of 'gnàthas-cainnte' indeed, and thanks to repeatedly listening to Beag air Bheag I knew the word before its meaning, which of course makes it 100 times easier to remember than a dry vocabulary list on a page.

The 'Oisean a' Ghràmair' section I find particularly useful, and now there is a Podcast I can repeat this section over and over again. When settled in one place I can study the pages on the website at http://www.bbc.co.uk/radionangaidheal and make notes.

Right now, at my self-assessed 'upper intermediate' stage after two years, I reckon on understanding about 55 per cent of what is said (there is some 'native speaker' stuff for advanced learners too). A beginner may start off only understanding five per cent, but I reckon that this beginner understanding five per cent of episode one will probably end up understanding 10 per cent of episode 15. I'm hoping that I end up understanding 60 per cent of episode 15.

So if you don't completely understand what's going on, keep listening (daily is good, on your commute to work) and keep absorbing the sounds. It's all going in and even if you don't realise it you ARE picking it up...beag air bheag.

Secrets of learning a language - quickly

Here is a link to a fascinating online article about language learning:

http://www.bbc.com/capital/story/20150302-secrets-to-learning-a-language

Thank you to my 'Study Buddy' (Caraid Cànan) Shiela, known to many as 'Granny Scalpay', for alerting me to this.

Coffee and Craic - Gaelic Cafe Society

As I touched on in the entry 'We Need to Talk,' there are precious few opportunities for us learners to speak Gaelic face-to-face with other learners and fluent speakers.

'If only there was a coffee shop somewhere,' I used to think, '..where I could hear and speak Gaelic, somewhere the Gaelic community uses as a social hub, and I could experience living, breathing Gaelic.' I did a bit of research and found that such Utopia did not exist.

At least, it didn't exist until the tail end of 2014. Watching the news An Là one evening on BBC Alba, a feature caught my eye about Gaelic singing sessions organised by An Lòchran that took place in a new Gaelic coffee shop in Glasgow. I got terribly excited for two reasons. Yup, grab that damp flannel folks, I need dabbing down yet again:

- I had found out that An Lòchran, a Gaelic Arts Organisation, actually existed
- I had found out that my Utopian Gaelic Coffee Shop also existed


Before long I was making haste to 74 Eldersleigh Street in Glasgow to see what this Gaelic Coffee Shop 'Coffee and Craic' was all about.

You can visit Coffee & Craic's Facebook Page by clicking here.

First of all, I'll tell you what you won't find.

You won't find a Sabhal Mòr Ostaig-Esque 100% Gaelic policy where you're surrounded (and possibly intimidated) by fluent speakers gabbling away at 100mph.
You won't find bad coffee.
You won't find attitude or stuffy formality.

What you WILL find is:

A warm and friendly welcome even if the only Gaelic word you have is 'Slàinte'.
A 'safe place' to speak/practice your Gaelic WHATEVER YOUR LEVEL OR ABILITY
A child-friendly environment where scribbling on the blackboard is positively encouraged
A dog-friendly place as long as your pooch doesn't get in the way or upset others
Fantastic coffee
Fabulous cakes (including Gluten-Free and Vegan), soups and sandwiches
A Variety of Gaelic classes and Kids Clubs throughout the week
Gillebrìde, the Coffee & Craic mascot

Did I mention the warm and friendly welcome? There's a small table near the window for 2/3 people, a sofa to flop down on opposite the counter, and everyone else sits around a large table, easing conversation if you want it but it's large enough to sit fairly quietly in the corner too. Oh, and there are power sockets and wifi... you know what I mean.

As I've hinted before, being an Englishman learning Gaelic can make me feel like a real 'outsider' which, to be fair, I am! Being born and bred in Dover hardly makes me a Gael. It can be a little scary at times to be in a big, big city like Glasgow and be looking for people to talk to - in English or in Gaelic. Yet already I have somewhere to go where I 'know' people, and a safe place to go to if I'm feelng a little bit wobbly or tired or just in need of somewhere quiet to sit and be me.

I've even done a couple of 'organised' conversation sessions here, and both times my Gaelic and my confidence has improved immeasurably. 

Find out a little bit more about the setting up of the cafe in this Daily Record Article here. 

If you need any further proof of what a great place this is, think on this: I last visited Coffee and Craic a couple of weeks ago when in Glasgow for Celtic Connections. The Coffee was great and the Craic brilliant. After getting back to Kent, I received a wee message from Sarah thanking me for returning to the cafe and hoping that I got back to Dover safe and sound. You don't get THAT with faceless tax-avoiding chain cafes.

Oh, and by the way, stop by for the porridge one morning. That alone is worth the trip from Dover.

How *do* you say 'Bon Apetit' in Gaelic?

***UPDATE 16TH JULY 2015: COFFEE AND CRAIC HAS SADLY CLOSED FOR THE TIME BEING. HOPEFULLY NEW PREMISES WILL BE FOUND SOON***

Cùm a' dol. Keep going.

We all get them. Down Days. 'Bad Gaelic' days. Days that we are tempted to jack it all in. Nothing seems to stick, it all just seems so futile.

We look around and all we see are people who are better than us. Brighter than us. More accepted than us. Better Gaelic than us. More confident than us. Gees, it's a rubbish feeling.


Well, I've just met a very inspiring man called Paul. He doesn't speak a word of Gaelic. He's a professional I've been to see about memory loss, and I want to tell you what he said to me.


I'm 45 years old and concerned that as the Gaelic fills up my brain, other things drop out of it. You know the kind of thing; remembering where I put my wallet, where I put my phone, and so on. I've even gone to work and forgotten to pick up my bag containing wallet, security badge, season ticket...everything.

'Am I bright enough to do this, Paul?' I asked. I left school at 17 and I've never done a degree or anything like that.

It turns out that Paul left school at 13 with no qualifications. Now, at an age that I'd peg a year or two older than me, he has done two master's degrees and just completed a PHD. He did these while working full time and raising a family.

*WOW!* Big respect.

A few weeks ago I was listening to Iain Urchadan's 'Beag a Bheag' programme on BBC Radio nan Gàidheal. I love this programme. One of the features is 'Luchd-ionnsachaidh na seachdain' (Learner of the Week), and one such learner was a very, very inspiring young man from Spain called Marcel. This clever, dedicated chap had studied Gaelic purely using online resources for two years, and had just embarked upon An Cùrsa Comais at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig.

However, to someone like me, such inspiring people only serve to show me just how useless I am. This guy had AMAZING Gaelic despite only learning for two years (the same as me) and by self-study and not with the help of courses and tutors like me. I'm not seeking sympathy, I'm just one of those people who feels a sense of admiration and respect towards the amazingly gifted high-fliers, yet they tend to make me feel pretty rubbish about my useless self.

Back to Paul, the man I saw to check out if I was bright enough to do this. You can almost guess what he said, can't you?

It turns out that there will ALWAYS be people more gifted and more talented than ourselves. That's just the way it is.

However, there is one way, and one way only, to get good at something academic. And funnily enough, it is nothing to do with intellect. No sir.

The one and only thing you need to acheive anything academic, and that includes learning a language, is nothing to do with possessing a brain the size of Inverness.

It is persistence.

Quite simply, you just have to keep going. That, my friends, is all you have to do.

Just. Keep. Going.

Cum a' dol.

The Path to Learning - Part 2

 So where were we... ah yes, I'd tried 'Gaelic in 12 Weeks' and took about 12 weeks just to get through the first chapter. I could recite tables of pronouns but I still couldn't say anything remotely useful.

January 2013 I was once again in my beloved Hebrides, on an off-grid caravanning trip. That's right: Hebrides, January, Caravan, Off-grid. As bonkers as it sounds, it was amazing.


I was determined to get this Gaelic thing licked, and sought out a course.

After much research, only one course stood out, and that was with Sabhal Mòr Ostaig on the Isle of Skye, doing a Distance Learning Beginner's Course called An Cùrsa Inntrigidh. I duly enrolled. Exceptionally, I did this in person as I was passing the college on my way home from the islands. When I got to the college and saw its amazing setting, my jaw dropped. I loved it from the second I entered the gates.


How An Cùrsa Inntrigidh Works

For starters, you can choose from 'Standard Track' or 'Accelerated Track'.

There are two considerations here, ability and timing: 

ABILITY

If you have *some* Gaelic and are confident you can handle a heavy workload, try the Accelerated Track. It's blooming hard work. I wanted to do Accelerated, but timing (see below) dictated Standard Track, and with hindsight I'm really glad I didn't do Accelerated. It would have been too hard.

TIMING

Looking ahead, the next course on from An Cùrsa Inntrigidh is An Cùrsa Adhartais (distance learning) or An Cùrsa Comais (full-time on campus). Both start at the beginning of the Scottish Academic Year, i.e. late August/September. Therefore, if (like me) you have missed the beginning of the academic year, you may as well start 'Standard Track' in January/February. This will take you through to the summer of the following year, leaving you in a good position at a good time to take your progression course.

You need to be aware that if you start Standard Track An Cùrsa Inntrigidh in September, you will finish the course then have a six-month wait to take your learning to the next level. Of course, you can do refreshers etc, but if your learning is standard (like me), you may as well start your learning in January and keep your head above water.


The course itself is structured by workbooks you download from a virtual 'Blackboard' and a weekly tutorial that you phone in to attend. It works like a conference call. Up to eight students and the tutor all call in and the spoken learning is done by phone. The tutor takes you through the work that you'll have done which he or she set the week previous.

Further information about the course may be found at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig's Website here.



At first it was all a bit intimidating. You have an induction week to make sure you know how everything works, and it's during this week I realised that this wasn't just some Adult Education Evening Class, this *really was* a proper University Foundation Course. The course itself was far more challenging than I had anticipated. I needed to spend about 8-12 hours a week on my Gaelic as I'm no natural learner. Some folks may get away with doing less, but if you scrimp on the course work, you'll soon be found out in tuturial. Besides, if you've paid good money and committed yourself to learning Gaelic, why would you then not do what you signed up to do?

One of the best parts of An Cùrsa Inntrigidh is the free weekend school that happens once a term. You pay only for accommodation and food, and of course your travel to/from Skye. I enjoyed three fantastic weekends during my 18 month course, despite never really ever having enough Gaelic to get by in any situation without reverting to English.  It was really worthwhile making the two day journey each way, as the course comes with one natural limitation: You never see your tutor, and some intonation is lost over the phone. To spend a 'real' weekend with Gaelic is a very, very useful thing to do.



There are other Gaelic courses out there, all of which you'll find on the learngaelic.net website. However, if you are serious about learning and cannot easily get to a college offering a good Gaelic course on a regular basis, then An Cùrsa Inntrigidh is, in my most humble opinion, the one to go for.

Why is an Englishman learning Scottish Gaelic?

'What on earth are you doing that for?' is normally the first question I get asked when I mention I'm studying Scottish Gaelic.

Deagh cheist (good question) as they'd say in Gaelic. After all, I am from Dover. I still spend most of my time near my family in Dover. I have a day job in London. I have absolutely no Scottish Heritage whatsover, at least not since as far back as the mid-1850s, which is as far back as my family tree goes. Apparently there was a bit of a to-do and a hoo-ha with the housekeeper masquerading as a wife or something, so it all went a bit fuzzy and unaccountable. We forget that everything that goes on today went on then. It was just looked upon differently and covered up (for better or for worse) as much as possible.

So no. No Celtic blood in these veins whatsoever. Cut me open and you'll get chalk from the White Cliffs of Dover, not peat from the Isle of Lewis.

So...why?

SENSE OF PLACE

I love, absolutely love, the Outer Hebrides. In fact, I love the whole of the Highlands and Islands, but especially the Western Isles. Without going into too much detail, I find a sense of peace and 'groundedness' in the Outer Hebrides that I fail to find elsewhere in the world. It really is 'my' special place. The landscape of the Highlands and Islands speaks Gaelic. Not just the signs and the place names, but the hills and the beaches. Learning Gaelic while continuing to live and work Down South provides me with a daily tenable link with the place I dearly love.

CULTURE

Everyone mentions this one. Gaelic culture is jaw-droppingly rich. The language, music, traditions, and stories are like an eternal onion; you can just keep peeling off layers and layers and finding a new one underneath. Unlike the uncultured yoof of the mainstream UK who adopt Vacant Consumerism as a way of living and have absolutely no clue where they come from, younger Gaels all seem to share an intense bond with their roots, their history, and their heritage. As a result of this, I never cease to be amazed at how many incredibly talented young people there are in the West of Scotland, and how few genuinely talented people there are elsewhere in the country. The energy and vibrancy of the Gaelic culture is something I simply cannot get enough of.

LANGUAGE

Unlike most popular languages learned in the UK (eg French, German, Spanish), Gaelic is a Celtic language and not a Romance language. It is totally and utterly different. This difference, and the difficulites it often presents, only serves to act as an incentive to 'keep going' on those all-too-familiar 'Bad Gaelic Days' when nothing ever seems to come out right. Now and again you'll hit on something that makes you explode with that 'Eureka!' feeling before suddenly realising you've become a language geek. For example: 'That is good' in Gaelic is: 'Is math, sin'. That's pronounced: ' 's-mar-shin'. Say it out loud....Smashing! That's why something that is 'smashing' in English is good. Ooh, dab me down with a damp flannel.

RESPECT

It makes my heart bleed to see people move to new places and set up an insular version of their own culture. Think of all those 'Brits Abroad' enclaves in Spain. Think 'Sonnenland', the German town in Gran Canaria. And yes, there are mainlanders and English folk who move to beautiful parts of the Gàidhealtachd and Islands then impose their unsuitable ways on the local traditions and landscape. Call me an ill-informed arrogant self-important twit, but if I'm going to move to the Hebrides - and one day I really hope I will - then to me it is important to learn the local traditions and culture. Even if I remain a perpetual tourist, my enjoyment and understanding will always be far more profound than had I not lifted the lid on the culture and language that the everyday obvious stuff on the surface sometimes conceals.

ACCEPTANCE

As I progress with my journey into Gaelic, 'acceptance' is becoming less and less of a motive. At first, I thought that anyone who spoke Gaelic would be treated and welcomed like a Gael. Two years down the line, I've come to accept that this is a culture that you cannot just learn a few phrases and barge your way into. Gaelic holds no place for Gatecrashers. That said, I've recently found a new group of people that welcome me with open arms. Those people are the 20,000 strong community of Gaelic Learners. The vast majority will always be standing on the sidelines of 'real' Gaelic life, but we find comfort and joy in each other's company.

KEEPING IT GOING

Let's face it, mainly thanks to the arrogant mistakes of the past, Gaelic a language teetering on the brink of dying out. Initiatives over the past 30-odd years are still working hard to stem that decline and start the number of speakers growing again. To lose Gaelic, and everything it holds, would be an absolute tragedy. By doing my little bit, it's helping keep the language afloat until such time its strong enough to really flourish yet again. It took generations to reduce Gaelic to where it is today, so it will take generations to get it back to a mainstream level. But, as the saying goes, Every Little Helps. 


REACTION OF OTHERS

What about the reaction of others?

This has surprised me, massively. The main reactions I've had from people when I say I'm learning Gaelic have been:

Bemusement
Discomfort
Passionate enthusiasm
Hostility.

There, you might not have expected one or two of those, eh?

BEMUSEMENT

This is the main reaction I get from fellow English people. Many of them don't even know what Gaelic is. They generally think that my learning it is a good thing and can only broaden my experience of life. But... well, it's just a bit bonkers, really, isn't it?
'There there, dear.'

DISCOMFORT

This is one reaction I've had from many native Gaelic-speakers. This is a whole open-ended story in itself which will hopefully merit its own blog entry. When first attempting to speak Gaelic with native-speakers that I didn't know, I was slightly taken aback by their silence and weak smiles. It took a while for me to learn that this was not rudeness in any way whatsoever, but a sense of awkwardness and embarrassment. Put it another way...imagine you've spoken a separate 'special' language with only your nearest and dearest for your entire life, and you use a 'formal' language for everyday business with the rest of the world. How would you feel one day if someone from that 'Outside' world spoke to you in your 'special' language for the first time, uninvited?

PASSIONATE ENTHUSIASM

This is the reaction that builds and builds. It mainly comes from people who have, or did have, even the most tenuous link with the promotion of Gaelic. You also get the same reaction from most Learners who are pleased to find another soulmate who 'understands' their struggles and triumphs. These are the people who make it all worthwhile, and these are the people you need to be hanging out with.

HOSTILITY

This is the saddest reaction of all, but thankfully the most rare, but you need to prepare yourself for it. So far, every instance I know of hostility (towards my own learning or that of my peers) has come from somebody Scottish. This has ranged from Gaelic speakers in Lewis and Glasgow to non-Gaelic speakers throughout Scotland. The Gaelic-speaking 'Hostiles' would rather see the language die than be modernised into a teachable form and taught in a formal way. Or, possibly, there is an objection to me, a Sassanach, being privy to their language and culture. I'm pleased to say that the latter has happened only once or twice over two years. Every barrel contains a narrow-minded rotten apple or two. There is also hostility from people outwith the Gaelic-speaking community in Scotland. They see Gaelic as a waste of public money. I image these are the kind of people who see a railway or a bus company as needing to generate profit as a stand-alone company. The truth of the matter is, Gaelic (just like railways and buses) generates income from tenuous connections, maybe not as a direct result of anything. Just imagine if the trains stopped running in Scotland. Commuters and visitors wouldn't easily be able to get to Edinburgh or Glasgow. Businesses and tourists would go to London or Manchester instead, taking their money with them. Same with Gaelic. I dread to think how much money I've pumped into the Scottish economy since that first trip to the Hebrides in 2009, and it's Gaelic that keeps me coming back and injecting more money, be it on tuition fees or on cake. Gaelic helps give Scotland its unique identity which keeps it a top tourist destination in the world, as well as a centre for learning and culture.




So there you have it: the Whys, Wherefores, and the Ups and Downs of the journey into Gaelic. It's like standing at the front of a CalMac Ferry during a rough crossing. You may have to hang on tight and brave the wind and waves, but it's an experience that makes you feel alive and it's a journey you'll never forget.

The Path to Learning

 
So you want to learn Scottish Gaelic? Bravo!

Right, that's enough about you, let's talk about me.

Only kidding...

I don't pretend to be any kind of authority on the subject, but what I can do is give you a few honest answers and pointers along the way.

If you're interested in learning the language, then your first point of call can only be one wonderful place:

learngaelic.net

Go and take a look. It's brilliant. You'll find all the info you need on courses and stuff, and in the meantime you can whet your appetite by trying to learn yourself using some of the FREE resources on offer through the website. Start off with the LearnGaelic Beginner's course you can do on your own computer, free of charge. I've just visited one of the lessons and who is the voice? Yup, it's the lovely Iain Urachadan.

You can also look at clips from the hugely successful TV programme 'Speaking Our Language'. Speaking Our Language (or, more to the point, Rhoda MacDonald the presenter) will be your friend throughout your journey of learning Gaelic, just like Iain Urchardan. You may not know these names now, but you will soon see them all over media if you stick with it.

My Gaelic Journey? Well, I'm glad you asked, thank you. Either learngaelic.net wasn't around when I first got interested in the language, or I didn't know it was around.


HOW NOT TO DO IT

Like many people I know, I thought I could reach fluency within three months with minimal financial outlay.

Wrong.

Like many of my fellow learners, I was enticed (on a CalMac ferry, if you must know) by a shiny shrink-wrapped course on the bookshelf in the Coffee Cabin called 'Scottish Gaelic in Twelve Weeks'. You got a book and some CDs. What more could you need?

Now, I'd better explain here and now that I'm not very academic. There are those clever people who ARE academic, and their approach to learning a language is what I personally refer to as 'scientific'. These people learn vocab and grammar, put the two together, and make a sentence. I don't. I listen and mimic and quite often talk gibberish. But to my mind, listening and speaking is the way to go. Hey, it worked for me when learning English after popping out of the womb, and it worked too when I learned Dutch as an adult trialling a Total Immersion Program.

'Gaelic in 12 Weeks' is nothing like an intuitive, natural course. I know that what I am about to write will come back to haunt me some time in the future. No doubt the clever chap who wrote the course will end up marking one of my exam papers in the future and say; "Aha! This paper belongs to that Sassanach Dip-brain who dissed my 12 Week course!' and promptly award a Fail.  But...

Wading through Scottish Gaelic in Twelve Weeks is drier than eating an entire box of Shredded Wheat. Toasted. Mixed with sand. With no liquid whatsoever. In the desert.

No doubt somebody, somewhere, has had the willpower to actually complete the whole course on their own. Maybe they even did it in 12 weeks. I imagine that that person had either nothing better to do in their life whatsoever and could devote every atom of time and willpower to doing it, OR it was the kind of person who doesn't drink, eats only grains and lentils, and has the willpower to get up every morning at 5.30am (including at the weekend) in order to complete their study before a delicious breakfast of Toasted Organic Wholemeal Sandal with a dandelion juice chaser.

This person is not me. I managed - just - to wade myself through one chapter in a month. It was a struggle of magnificent fortitude. I would open the book and cry. I'd listen to the voacb on the CDs and wince. A better plan of action was needed.


SERIOUS LEARNING

Once you've dabbled with the Beginner Pages on learngaelic.net or maybe even done a short course or two, you may decide to take your learning on to a more structured level. Enter Scotland's Gaelic College, Sabhal Mòr Ostaig (SMO).

Just like Iain Urchardan and Rhoda MacDonald, Sabhal Mòr Ostaig is something that nobody outwith the Gaelic-speaking community has ever heard of, and everyone within the Gaelic-speaking community knows as well and holds as dear as an old friend or neighbour.

Serious learners end up at Sabhal Mòr Ostaig, either doing Short Courses in the school holidays, part-time distance-learning courses (An Cùrsa Inntrigidh/An Cùrsa Adhartais), and some even take the plunge and do THE be-all and end-all Gaelic language course, An Cùrsa Comais.

I'll tell you what I did after the unsuccessful Ryvita-esque 'Gaelic in 12 Weeks' dabble next time.